Just Frances

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The road to recovery

This entry was posted on Monday, April 4th, 2016 by Frances Ryan.
Tags: sad, itp, health, fear

It’s been more than three weeks since I was first stricken with a nasty little virus, and I am still on the road to recovery. I expect it will be a long road, but I’m hoping it’s not too long! After all, I have too many lovely spring-time plans to be laid up half-dead for much longer!

I don’t really know what started this miserable little journey, but my haematologist seems to think it was likely a strain of influenza. And the recovery for “flu” can take a short while even without underlying health conditions. But as I do have underlying conditions, I might be in for a longer journey than most.

Frustratingly, the bug knocked my immune system out of whack and sent my platelet count spiralling to a single-digit count, which meant a short stint on bedrest until they climbed back to a safe level. But my body is still fighting whatever virus it caught which is taking a lot of energy. My white counts have gone from too low to too high and my platelet counts have gone a bit haywire. And my platelets don’t seem ready or willing to settle down yet.

My body is waging an internal war for and against itself. And it’s hard work fighting a war. It’s taking every ounce of my energies to keep me going and there doesn’t seem to be enough energy left to allow me the simple pleasure of staying awake all day.

Yes, I am low on energy and I am exhausted! I am completely run down and can’t find the energy to do the smallest thing. So even though I’ve now been cleared to go to the office and undertake physical activity “as I can manage it”, I don’t actually have the energy to do anything. And when I do find the energy to do something, I end up even more worn out and exhausted because my stubborn mind thinks that I am more able than my body actually is. Which means it’s one step forward, two steps back.

I am frustrated. I am upset. And I am feeling really negative because I am just so tired of feeling so tired!

But whilst I am a bit negative, please do know that I count my blessings, too. I live in a country where access to medical care is readily accessible for all, thanks to the wonders of the “free at the point of service” National Health Service. My diseases, whilst serious and potentially life-limiting or life-threatening, are not inherently deadly. (Though there are no cures for either.) And I have an amazing network of supportive family and friends who will help out when I’m unwell. (Just to count a few!)

I don’t know how much longer I’ll be down, but I’m hoping to regain a little bit of energy over the coming days and weeks. After all, I’m registered for a half marathon at the end of May and I’d really like to be able to run it—especially since I had to skip my March half marathon as that’s when I was first stricken down with this bug.

I hope this post hasn’t brought any worry to any of you. I am under excellent medical care and I am confident that I will (eventually) be back to my normal, energetic self before too long. In the meantime, I will try not to be too quiet, though I don’t know when I’ll be up for any great adventures!

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